Tuesday 1st Sept. Baited. Pigeon babies, and the conflict over awesome service at McDonalds
- Richard Haywood
- 11 minutes ago
- 4 min read
Woohoo.
There it was, all done and finished. Mike Humber Book 3. It’s been so much fun writing this one. The whole story is set in the town of Barnard Castle, where Mike is sent to find a man called Ollie Perkins, but he isn’t allowed to ask anyone, or say the name. Which, of course, prompts all sorts of shenanigans.
I do love writing Mike Humber. I’ve got the 4th book cooking away in my head. So yes, I am very happy that it’s finished. I would hold my hand up for a high five, but I’m British and it’s awkward AF for us. We always miss and then spend days locked in cringeworthy mental replays. I’m not a hugger either. Not with humans anyway. Dogs and pigeons are fine. My pigeons don’t like hugs. I did have one called Lady Pigeon that was super huggy, but his broken wing healed and he flew off. He still comes back for food now and then.
Talking of food, nice segue there, I took my daughter for a late morning brunch / lunch thing a weekend or two ago. I say I took her. We both went together so I’d have the pleasure of watching her type into her phone while it was inches from her face.
Anyway. We went to a café in Newport (the county town of the Isle of Wight). A big place. It was about a third full, dull and lifeless. The staff were expressionless and dour, a lot of the tables were covered in empties and it wasn’t very clean. The menu had been redone and it was all words of dishes that needed Googling and the whole thing was just a bit shit. Even my daughter raised her head from the glow of the phone and asked if we could go somewhere else.
We tried another couple of local cafes and it was much the same. Unsmiling staff, uncleared tables and only a few customers in each.
I was figuring this is just what life is now. Young people aren’t developing the ability to use facial expressions. They’re used to seeing life in a way that doesn’t look back at them.
But then we went into McDonald’s.
It was packed. A young person greeted us with a smile at the door and said we could order at the counter or use the digital screens. We used the screens, took a number and got the last table. Which was clean. The whole place was spotless.
The food came quickly, piping hot, brought over by another smiling young person who asked if we needed anything else. There were all sorts of people there. Older people in nice clothes. Families. Contractors popping in for a quick lunch. Teenagers.
After a while someone else appeared, with a smile, and asked if they could take the tray away. My daughter was still picking at her fries, in between programming satellites for NASA on her phone judging by the speed of the texting underway. When we did finish, I stood up with the tray to look for the bin and yet another smiling young person came and took it from me.
I’ve thought about it since, and honestly, I’m a little conflicted. On the one hand it proves that young people are still capable of smiling, communicating and providing nice service. It was lovely to see, and the skills they are being taught in that industry will carry forward into their lives.
It also means someone is training them and putting that time and effort into it.
Which is the source of the conflict, because I’d rather give my hard-earned money to a local business instead of a goliath corporation. But I can’t bring myself to spend more money in grubby places staffed by people who have zero communication skills.
That’s all I’ve got to say about that really. It was simultaneously both a reassuring and slightly sad experience.
I’ve already rattled on enough, so I won’t yack on much more, but I did want to share this joyous event. Scratch has had a baby squab! The skinny little feral pigeon that ran into my house over a year ago covered in blood after being savaged by a cat, who I thought was going to die, is now a father – and a very good dad.
Because of the bond I have with Scratch I can get quite close when he’s feeding without causing distress and it’s just beautiful to watch. The squab is already 4 days old and packing weight on. I don’t get too close with the mum pigeon (Marcy) as it would distress her.
I’ve posted some lovely videos on IG and FB (if you’re interested in alien looking baby pigeons 😂)
That’ll do for now. I’ll email again when BAITED goes live on Kindle and Paperback. Audio will follow in due course. And the cover for my next big sci-fi book, Changing Worlds, due out in January 2027 is coming soon. I’ll share that too when I have it.
Much love!
